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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/12/2010 10:17:04 AM
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pashong
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I also agree, certainly, at least, at this point in time, that Masturbation is sinful. At least for me, it is. And, I've tried to be "okay" with it, and I could not get the assurance in my heart that it was "okay", no matter how much I tried to convince myself. I admit though that there have been a FEW times, amongst the many, many times that I've masturbated, that I did not feel guilt as a result. I'm single, and I've had wet dreams, which almost only occured during the periods of time when I abstained from masturbating. I never felt guilt from those times. And, believe me, those times were VERY special to me, because I credited the LORD for causing that to happen. I mean, the way he designed the man's body to have that "release valve". I think a more important way of looking at it, since we are to follow the Lord YAHUSHUA (JESUS) in all ways, then, WWYD?/WWJD? I could imagine YAHUSHUA having sex, with a woman who was His wife, but, I cannot for the life of me, picture Him masturbating....even though He was Single, and would've had "every reason" to. It's a DAILY STRUGGLE, at first, to refrain from masturbating, but, I personally feel alot "cleaner" inside, with one less monkey on my back as a result. Once I get past about a week and a half without "tossing off", as I sometimes call it, it can become "easier", and not so much of a problem. About a month later, it starts to become a non-issue. But, that will also be determined on whether or not I ALLOW sexual images in my head. If I keep my mind clean, then it's only the waking up times that become thew challenges. Which then I have to praise GOD for His wonderful creation of the human body, and get my mind off of wantingrelease, which I can do. GOD has made the man's body (and woman's) so incredible, I am just at AWE of Him. Brother's, we're made in the Image of the Father, just as YAHUSHUA (JESUS) was made in His Father's Image. His physical Human Body included. I respect the Brother above who feels fine about being able to both experience orgasm with his wife, and also with masturbation. Though the sensation, as he experiences, is greater with masturbation, but, he has not let that rob his wife, and himself, of time with his wife. Nevertheless, I'm reminded of the Verse that states that "All things are lawful, but, not all things are expedient." It's always wisest to take this issue to the LORD, seeking HIS Counsel, whether married or single, for, at the End of the Day, after Death, it is HE whom we will each stand before and give an account of our lives. Blessings. :-)
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/12/2010 11:33:27 AM
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Obadyah
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Taking a small portion of what the previous writer wrote. I think it's sinful to me as well. God also did the same thing of giving me wet dreams (for 2-years) of my abstinence while single. I look at it like me trying to show myself that I have complete control over my flesh through Christ.
I think masturbation is fine if one is single because we men store it in such a dark place that if we chose to do so no one will know. It becomes a relationship in which we find ourselves tearing over. However, this isn't the case when we become married. Some woman don't like the idea of it at all. It makes them feel like they're not good enough. As if there is something missing, in which they can not provide. Some men will say, "Well if I do it without porn then I'm good because I'm not lusting." How honest are we being here? Are we all to think we can achieve this with out having a flashing thought of 1 woman pass through our minds? If you can pull that off God bless you, but I seriously doubt that's the case.
I've tried and failed simply for the reason that when I was single and tried to do it I would flash back to an ex-girlfriend,present friend, old porn, a picture, neighbors and more. Of course this was when I first came to Christ and things like this were an issue for me.
I would just ask that those who do this practice and look forward to being married be mindful of how your wife would appreciate you using your hand versus allowing her to please you. I think we can easily make a connection to this thread and the marriage topics and start to understand how these woman end up marrying these men that put them in these horrible mind sets. The men are us. I would recommend that we start working on this in our singlesness to try to steer ourselves away from any future problems with the ones we love. Though the Bible doesn't call this an out right sin. I read and heard over and over again. That whatever we do in isolation, that we don't tell others should raise the question "Why"?
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/13/2010 11:37:06 PM
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walterquez
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I am not saying this will definitely get rid of it, but it does help as the Church has prescribed it. I am referring to fasting. The Orthodox fast every Wednesdays and Fridays. We also do a 40 day fast twice a year; one before Easter and the other Christmas. Seems a lot, but really it is not, once you get used to it.
I am not saying this to boast, but to admit that we are weak, hence the fasting. We fast not because we are better than others, but rather fast because we are not better than others. We fast in order to have the strength to overcome sinful lusts. When we over eat, and don't give our bodies a break from certain foods, weird things begin to happen to us. When we sleep our bodies begins to discharge, and we sometimes have weird dreams. This should not be foreign to us. How many of us have said what did you eat last night, or must have been the pizza I ate late last night. To alleviate this problem, among others, we fast and pray.
Try it. Just like Daniel told the Babylonians, give us to eat our food and not from the king's food for a period of time. And then see how we fare compare to the others.
Give your bodies a break. Let it rest and you will be rewarded. The discharges at night will begin to go away, the desire for self pleasure will wane. Before you know it, you will be set free from these sinful lusts. Of course, if you go back to over eating or eating animal products every day, your body will do its best to get rid of it one way or another. At night when you are asleep, or increase an uncontrollable desire to give yourself pleasure.
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St. Athanasius the Great
For our Canons and our forms were not given to the Churches at the present day, but were wisely and safely transmitted to us from our forefathers.
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/16/2010 11:43:35 AM
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BlackCapnHarlock
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Hello folks .. long time no hear from.
I want to say I have gone six months without viewing pornography!!!! That means no websites, pay per view, no magazines . . no adult book stores .. may GOD continue to keep me in his grace . . . amen.
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Ezekiel 16:6 Eze 16:6 And when I passed by thee, and saw thee polluted in thine own blood, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live; yea, I said unto thee when thou wast in thy blood, Live.
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/16/2010 1:57:03 PM
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alexander78
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I have been struggling with masturbation since I was 13 years old and till this day I have been struggling every day. Even though, I have stop but I still want to do it still because I know it will lead to more sin. I'm a single man and I was dabbling in homosexuality but I not going to go into details with that this forum. It has been over a month looking at watching pornography online, porn magazines, and going to adult bookstores and websites. I go still want to masturbate. I need help and advice from other men of God. I also have wet dreams and I was wondering if that normal.
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Brother in Christ Jesus,
Alex
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/16/2010 2:02:58 PM
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Obadyah
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quote:
ORIGINAL: BlackCapnHarlock
Hello folks .. long time no hear from.
I want to say I have gone six months without viewing pornography!!!! That means no websites, pay per view, no magazines . . no adult book stores .. may GOD continue to keep me in his grace . . . amen.
Proud of you brother. I don't want your accomplishment to go unknown.
Praise God!
_____________________________
" Live to Live Again"
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/16/2010 3:14:09 PM
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DaveW
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BCH and Alexander - congrats on staying porn free for your time! Keep it up!
Alexander, the need for sexual release is completely normal (primarily hormonally driven). So that you would be wanting relief that way and having wet dreams is to be expected. Viewing the porn or dwelling your thoughts on sexual images will tend to up the hormone levels, so the longer you can stay away from that the less of a struggle it will be. Be thankful you can get some releif from the wet dreams. Only about 40% of men can do that. Most of us have the dream but wake up a second or 2 from going over the edge of the "wet" part, leaving us in a VERY BAD PLACE if one is trying to avoid masturbating. You are SOOOOO close that any movement at all could trigger it.
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Winner of 2010 "best in "He Says"
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Our CD is available here:
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/16/2010 8:58:27 PM
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John1958
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quote:
ORIGINAL: alexander78
I need help and advice from other men of God.
Whenever you get an urge ( for anything you may question) stop for a second and say to your self, " If Jesus was standing right beside me, would I still do it?"
_____________________________
Powerlifting for Jesus!
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/17/2010 9:17:52 AM
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pashong
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BlackCapnHarlock, That's fantastic news!:-) Keep on that Straight and Narrow, it's the ONLY Road that leads to Heaven. YAHUSHUA (JESUS) is the Way, and you've made good strides in following Him. I'll bet you feel "cleaner" in comparison. And, do your best to keep following the SPIRIT and not the flesh and to not let the Enemy get a foothold. We have the Advocate if we stumble (I John 2:1), but, our Goal is Holiness and Purity, for without Holiness no man will see the LORD. Blessings and Shalom, Brother!
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/17/2010 9:24:44 AM
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pashong
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DaveW., Yes, I had that very thing happen to me a short while back. Right on the verge of release during a wet dream and I woke up! X-( I tried falling back to sleep in hopes that the dream would reoccur and I could finish where I left off, but, as you would guess rightly, it didn't work out that way. What a total let-down. Father YAHUVEH is still Good and I know that He will provide later as I walk in His SPIRIT. Shalom, Brother!
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/23/2010 8:19:01 PM
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DNP
Posts: 910
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quote:
ORIGINAL: walterquez
quote:
ORIGINAL: DaveW
Most of us have the dream but wake up a second or 2 from going over the edge of the "wet" part, leaving us in a VERY BAD PLACE if one is trying to avoid masturbating. You are SOOOOO close that any movement at all could trigger it. This is so sad if this happens with most. 
In that case it seems your body is trying to go "over the edge". Why is it sad? Ever wake up to a cough or a sneeze? Why would a release be sinful if you did it yourself, yet be innocent only "a second or 2" earlier if your brain was trying to push it naturally?
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/24/2010 10:08:06 AM
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pashong
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Alex, The wet dreams are normal. You have no control over those, at least, per se. Because, the male body produces sperm every day, the body will naturally release that from time to time. For some men, more often, for others, less often. I look at wet dreams as GOD's "relief valve, really, because, I know that, for me, when I've had a wet dream, which is not very often, it wasn't my hand causing the release, it happened as a result of a dream, etc., while I was sleeping. As I mentioned before, ROMANS 6 is another Scripture to meditate and believe on. It says we're free from sin. Free from having to sin. Which is exactly what GOD wants. I am struggling myself now, and I am soldiering on for this Goal of living holy before GOD, like you're trying to do. Blessings in YAHUSHUA (JESUS), Brother :-)
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/26/2010 11:24:59 AM
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DaveW
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quote:
I look at wet dreams as GOD's "relief valve, Then why do only about 40% of men ever have them? That is less than half. I read the study some years ago and it did not seem to matter whether the guys M'd or not. It was still less than half.
(you can go to the research section of www.themarriagebed.com to confirm the number)
_____________________________
Avatar is my son Caleb and Leah on their wedding 12/20/09
=======================
Winner of 2010 "best in "He Says"
=======================
Our CD is available here:
http://cdbaby.com/cd/dswaggoner
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/26/2010 11:42:45 AM
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Obadyah
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I'm just a little lost here. Are we now saying that we are controlling our thinking when we shut our brains off and sleep. And that those who have sexual arousal through a thought or simple explosion should feel ashamed and account the outcome as sin?
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" Live to Live Again"
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/26/2010 11:45:17 AM
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Obadyah
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Before you try to use the thinking aspect as being a sin let me clarify that when you are sleep your just that--sleep.
Defined as the following:
to take the rest afforded by a suspension of voluntary bodily functions and the natural suspension, complete or partial, of consciousness; cease being awake.
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" Live to Live Again"
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/26/2010 1:07:39 PM
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DaveW
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There are those who count wet dreams as sin. The official historic stance of the RCC was any ejaculation that could not reasonably lead to making your wife pregnant was sinful. I am not sure they ever adequately answered whether someone who was infertile or sterile should even get married.
_____________________________
Avatar is my son Caleb and Leah on their wedding 12/20/09
=======================
Winner of 2010 "best in "He Says"
=======================
Our CD is available here:
http://cdbaby.com/cd/dswaggoner
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/26/2010 1:49:46 PM
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Obadyah
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Wow! That seems a bit unfair... I can see if there had to be a sexual thought attached with this, but normally when this did occur for me it simply happened.
There are a few times my mind wondered to actual intercourse, but that wasn't the norm.
Going back a few post to answer your question as to how and why most men don't have these dreams. I would bet that it's all related to individual experience. If I in my sinful lifestyle had sex nearly 3 times day, and you only had sex every 3 times per month your body, which is a computer is then programing itself to release at a certain point based off that pattern. This isn't in the sense of a gas tank being full and then over flowing, but a fair comparison would probably be someones appetite for food. I think angle to see these dreams from.
For the heck of it this does fall into a weird category on Marlow's hierarchy list of needs for human survival. Sex which includes such things as this falls into the "Physiological" spectrum, which happens to be the lowest on the chain representing one of the humans basic needs.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Maslow's_hierarchy_of_needs
I'm not saying that this makes it acceptable because our ways are not the ways of God, but I simply think that position is interesting
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" Live to Live Again"
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 4/30/2010 11:29:42 AM
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pashong
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Dave, As I believe, at this point, that Masturbation is sin for single Christian men, that if we will use self control, that GOD will allow us sexual release through wet dreams. GOD designed the man's body, and he knows the needs of it's functions. He has called His people to maintain control over the flesh, like Sha'ul (Paul) said that he "buffeted" his body to kepp it under control, rather than be controled by his flesh. The Bible says for us to follow the Spirit, and we will not fulfill the (sinful) lusts of the flesh. I believe that for married men, there can be a place for masturbation as long as BOTH partners are in agreement. For the husband's body belongs to his wife, and vice versa. Mutual masturbation, then, for the couple would be allowable, like oral sex would be, also. But, for the single man, I believe, that ALL sex is off limits, and should be the single's goal to stay away from it. The more I have masturabated, the more I am sensitive to sexual arousal and the desire to "get off". Whereas, when I've gone periods of time without masturbating, and without sexual thoughts, the desire to have orgasm wanes and becomes a non-issue. The Scriptures declare that the Marriage Bed is undefiled. Sex is for the married couple, for making babies and enjoying each others bodies in closeness and private intimacy. And, the more private our marital sexual acts are, the more valuable, personable and cherished they are. Which, btw, is why pornography on paper or by video is so corrupting, it's acts being performed in front of an audience which destroys it's inate GOD-given value. Shalom,
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/4/2010 1:03:12 AM
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JHerr
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quote:
ORIGINAL: pashong
Dave, As I believe, at this point, that Masturbation is sin for single Christian men, that if we will use self control, that GOD will allow us sexual release through wet dreams. GOD designed the man's body, and he knows the needs of it's functions. He has called His people to maintain control over the flesh, like Sha'ul (Paul) said that he "buffeted" his body to kepp it under control, rather than be controled by his flesh. The Bible says for us to follow the Spirit, and we will not fulfill the (sinful) lusts of the flesh. I believe that for married men, there can be a place for masturbation as long as BOTH partners are in agreement. For the husband's body belongs to his wife, and vice versa. Mutual masturbation, then, for the couple would be allowable, like oral sex would be, also. But, for the single man, I believe, that ALL sex is off limits, and should be the single's goal to stay away from it. The more I have masturabated, the more I am sensitive to sexual arousal and the desire to "get off". Whereas, when I've gone periods of time without masturbating, and without sexual thoughts, the desire to have orgasm wanes and becomes a non-issue. The Scriptures declare that the Marriage Bed is undefiled. Sex is for the married couple, for making babies and enjoying each others bodies in closeness and private intimacy. And, the more private our marital sexual acts are, the more valuable, personable and cherished they are. Which, btw, is why pornography on paper or by video is so corrupting, it's acts being performed in front of an audience which destroys it's inate GOD-given value. Shalom,
I understand where you are coming from with this, but I disagree. For me personally, wet dreams are not an option. Why? Because wet dreams are often a dream where I am lusting after a woman, or where my mind is allowing me the chance to have intercourse with her. Both of these I consider sin. By masturbating (without porn, or visuals. It took me a long while, but I learned how to masturbate with my mind blank), I allow myself to release upon my own standards, and standards that I believe God would favor.
Just because I masturbate from time to time, does not mean that my body has been defiled. It doesn't mean that I will love my future wife less. And as I can tell, it isn't disobeying God.
_____________________________
And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
http://vaporzone.blogspot.com/ ~Update 5/03/10
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/4/2010 11:16:50 AM
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DaveW
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Excelent post JHerr.
I never got the whole "...masturbation is sin for single Christian men" and "...for married men, there can be a place for masturbation ."
This just seems completely backwards to me. The single who has no partner has no legal outlet but the married man can (as long as his wife agrees) have that same outlet denied to the single guy.
Thruought scripture God always seems to care for the poor, the downtrodden, etc. He makes a way for those who have no other way. To my way of thinking, M fits that very well for the single.
_____________________________
Avatar is my son Caleb and Leah on their wedding 12/20/09
=======================
Winner of 2010 "best in "He Says"
=======================
Our CD is available here:
http://cdbaby.com/cd/dswaggoner
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/5/2010 10:31:26 AM
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pashong
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JHerr, Yes, but with wet-dreams, you have no control over the dreams, nor as to when you have the dreams. So, a man cannot be held accountable for said dreams. I would say, the "exception" would be, how much you spend time, in the awake hours, thinking of sex, which COULD affect the kind of dreams you'd have. But, still, if you make the effort, in your awake time, to stay sexually pure in your heart, mind and eyes....then, your wet dream will be a treat, of sorts, of release, rather than a burden. That has been my own experience.
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/5/2010 3:03:56 PM
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JHerr
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From: Michigan
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quote:
ORIGINAL: pashong
JHerr, Yes, but with wet-dreams, you have no control over the dreams, nor as to when you have the dreams. So, a man cannot be held accountable for said dreams. I would say, the "exception" would be, how much you spend time, in the awake hours, thinking of sex, which COULD affect the kind of dreams you'd have. But, still, if you make the effort, in your awake time, to stay sexually pure in your heart, mind and eyes....then, your wet dream will be a treat, of sorts, of release, rather than a burden. That has been my own experience.
I boldened this for a reason. My personal experience, is that I have control. If I masturbate, I wont have wet dreams, that's how it has always been for me. So by not masturbating, I am allowing myself to thinking lustfully after a woman, directly disobeying God. Yet by masturbating, with an empty mind, I am following His laws.
And why would God consider it a treat for you to have sex with a woman out of wed lock? I mean, Christ told us to lust after a woman was to commit adultery with her in your heart. So a wet dream is your lusting after a woman...and more specifically having some type of sexual contact with her, in your mind. Why would you even consider this a gift from the Father?
_____________________________
And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
http://vaporzone.blogspot.com/ ~Update 5/03/10
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/5/2010 3:42:45 PM
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trainfan
Posts: 4765
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From: The land of confusion
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quote:
ORIGINAL: pashong
JHerr, Yes, but with wet-dreams, you have no control over the dreams, nor as to when you have the dreams. So, a man cannot be held accountable for said dreams. I would say, the "exception" would be, how much you spend time, in the awake hours, thinking of sex, which COULD affect the kind of dreams you'd have. But, still, if you make the effort, in your awake time, to stay sexually pure in your heart, mind and eyes....then, your wet dream will be a treat, of sorts, of release, rather than a burden. That has been my own experience.
I agree, you cannot control what you dream. I get headaches quite often and have extremely vivid dreams (perhaps from the painkillers) most I cannot remember, some I can. These are not of a sexual nature but none make any sense, for instance from a recent one I remember, people who I worked with were shopping for building materials. In this particular dream I was driving away after buying the materials and I was getting shot at by someone I did not know. Now I never went shopping for building materials with these people and my job didn't involve building plus I have never been shot at. I suppose using some of the reasoning here if I shot back in my dream and killed the guy shooting at me I would be guilty of murder.
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RE: Masturbation - One Stop Thread - 5/5/2010 4:37:48 PM
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JHerr
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From: Michigan
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Yes and no. You cannot control what you dream, and I agree with this. What I was implying, trainfan, was that I can control if I have wet dreams. Me, personally. I see wet dreams as a violation of God's law. That is my personal view. Because of that, I do what I can to avoid them. And seeing that I have the power to avoid them, if I did not take such actions, I would be willingly allowing myself to violate God's laws. KWIM? It would be a premeditated (for lack of a better term) sin on my part, since I do have the power to avoid wet dreams yet I still take the actions that result in them.
_____________________________
And I'll be by your side
Wherever you fall
In the dead of night
Whenever you call
And please don't fight
These hands that are holding you
http://vaporzone.blogspot.com/ ~Update 5/03/10
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